are those who agree with you."
-- Alan Cohen
New: Audio version
[Classic post from 7-28-15]
Having someone disagree with me used to set off a flood of defensive thoughts and scenarios in my head. Criticism of any kind isn't all that wonderful to listen to. I prefer people who agree with me and like what I do and how I do it. I prefer people who compliment me and build me up. And yet, there are not nearly enough of those kinds of people around when you need them sometimes.
I had a meeting today. I anticipated that there may be some kind of confrontation. No need for details, as they are not the least bit important. What is important is that I was feeling apprehension the past couple of days when I thought about the meeting. Of course, I wanted the meeting to be positive, upbeat and work out perfectly, but my defenses were on alert because my ego was trying to be in charge.
After my morning regular 15-minute meditation, an hour or so later, I decided to sit and meditate specifically on the good outcome of this meeting. After I closed my eyes and focused on my breathing, this thought came to me clear as a bell: I am at peace with disagreement. I was surprised and amazed. I thought, wow! That is interesting and profound. I kept repeating, I am at peace with disagreement.
Then, other similar thoughts began tagging along: I am at peace with disappointment. I am at peace with other people's anger. I am at peace with problems. I am at peace with what I do and how I do it. I am at peace with my skills, my uniqueness, my work, my values. I am at peace with what I do and I am at peace with who I am. I am peace. I am love. I am joy.
I have never met the person who would be in the meeting, but I envisioned everything going well and me being at peace. During the meeting after getting some feedback and feeling a tinge of defensiveness, I opened my briefcase and wrote on a piece of paper: I am at peace with disagreement. I am at peace with who I am. I am at peace.
The meeting went very well. I was pleased, and I owe it to the energy balancing an hour before the meeting. We have such a tendency to just act, to think that everything is about action, and I have learned that the state of mind is more important. I don't do this often enough, but I am renewed in my desire to match my energy with my intentions before I act whenever I can. As I do so, the outcome will be so much more to my liking. I'm certain of it.
Try it yourself. Next time you are meeting with someone and you have any defensiveness going on, or apprehension about the meeting for whatever reason, do a short meditation on how you want that meeting to end. See it already successfully accomplished. See how you are feeling after the meeting. Feel the feeling. Then rest in your inner confidence and watch what happens.
I Am At Peace With All.
Spread Some Joy Today--Or spread some peace or love today. They are very nearly the same thing.