"It doesn't matter how many times
during the day that I pick up the rope,
it only matters that I lay it down."
-- Terry Minion
New: Audio version
[Classic post from 6-20-15]
It doesn't matter to me anymore whether after picking up the rope and pulling on it I think I am winning the tug-o-war or losing the war. It is all resistance. Simply the act of picking it up is resistance. And, I now realize and understand that whenever I pick up that rope, I feel bad. It doesn't matter what name I give the emotion, such as, anger, jealousy, unhappiness, hurt feelings, disappointment, they are always negative when I have the rope in my hands--even when I think I'm winning.
I might pick up that rope many times during the day. Some people might think I need the exercise. However, there is one strong value in realizing that I have the rope in my hands again. It is that I am seeing what I do not want, and this allows me to realize that I am struggling with what I do not want. At the same time, as I pay attention to how I am feeling, I have the opportunity to know what I do want instead, and if I summon even the smallest amount of courage, I can drop the rope and go in the direction of my new desire, and I will always feel good in the process.
Some might think that when I finally get fully positive that I will never ever again have negative thoughts and emotions. That will never happen. What does, and what has happened though, is that I no longer dwell on what I don't want as much, and every day that I realize my own power, I dwell there less and less. So, yes, I pick up that rope, often not realizing that I have done so for a short while, but by paying attention to how I am feeling, and noticing that I am not feeling good, I remember that which is what I want more than anything: to feel good. At that moment, I drop the rope, and there I am feeling better already.
There are hundreds of ways that we all pick up that rope. We often find plenty of justification. And I know this--whenever we pick up that rope, we are not feeling good. We are feeling bad. We will never feel good holding on to the rope. It doesn't matter how strong we think we are or how many are on our side pulling because holding and pulling on that rope is a no-win game. Unless we enjoy feeling bad, the only solution to feeling good is in dropping the rope. It doesn't matter how many times we pick it up each day, week, month, year. It only matters that we lay it down so that we can feel good again. With each act of laying it down, we get more and more relief.
Lay It Down. Or Not. We Always Choose For Ourselves.
Spread Some Joy Today--by realizing that we cannot hold the rope and have joy at the same time.