I loved this quote above as soon as I saw it.
Marjane had another one that adds nicely to this one where she says, "We can
only feel sorry for ourselves when our misfortunes are still supportable. Once
this limit is crossed, the only way to bear the unbearable is to laugh at it." I
totally get that and have crossed that line many times.
To add even more perspective to this, Khalil Gibran
gives us this gem: "Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to
you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as
by the way your mind looks at what happens."
I had a couple thoughts in the last few days that I
wanted to share. One is that some people like to complain. There may be many
things going on, maybe going awry, or maybe more on their plate than is
comfortable. I know the feeling. As we complain about those things, feeling
sorry for ourselves is a natural response. I think that this is essentially what
a complaint really is when you take the make-up off it.
As we complain, we need ears to hear it, otherwise
it is a burden, or at least that is how it feels. Yet there is a better way to
release that burden but some are not yet ready to release it because that
requires us to stop complaining, and act, or I should say, counter-act by
focusing on what is okay or good rather than what is not okay or bad. It is so
true as Khalil says that it is how our mind looks at it, not what is actually
The other thought was feeling sad about
circumstances that we may seem to have no control over. Some think that is a
natural thing for us to do, and I would agree that it is something that is quite
common, and most would call it normal behavior. Yet, I have found that
unnatural, and even unhealthy. I think that this is another way that we can feel
sorry for ourselves and the fact that so many see it as normal, they then gladly
feel sorry for you and empower your continued sadness. One payoff is the
I could give you an itemized list of so-called
problems I have all around me in my life, and yet I know that my list would pale
to some other people and their list, so I think we all run into these things
called problems, but how we deal with them can be quite dramatically different.
As Marjane Satrapi says, "But how are you gonna make the situation better?"
The way that I find most effective for me is to
focus on what I am thankful for, what I love to look at, what I love to do. I
deal with the issues when they absolutely have to be dealt with and not before.
I have stopped fretting about them so much and if I give them attention early,
it is very short lived. In other words, I look at them differently. I don't call
them problems so much as just what is and I accept that somehow I brought this
into my life and try to find the value in it rather than the harm.
Feeling Sorry For Myself Cannot Be Solved From Outside Myself, Only From
Spread Some Joy Today--Turn your life around by choosing different and
better feeling thoughts.