"We must be our own
before we can be another's."
-- Ralph Waldo Emerson
There are a lot of ways so many give their power away. One that is so predominant in our world has to do with the conditional loving of romantic relationships. Who hasn't heard the very famous line from the movie, Jerry Maguire: "You complete me." And songs. . . wow, thousands of songs about this subject, like the classic, All Out of Love by Air Supply. You know, "I'm all out of love, I'm so lost without you. . . I'm all out of love, what am I without you?" Even in songs at contemporary Christian churches it is easy to hear these kind of lyrics and messages, except referring to us and God or Jesus instead of two people.
The idea of being lonely or feeling lonely comes from this place of imagined incompleteness. This whole idea of thinking that "I'm nothing without you, or lost without you" makes me want to bust out laughing, yet I used to plug into that concept just like so many do today.
I began to see myself as whole instead of trying to find my missing part, and now I have my own power back. When we think that we are incomplete and we require someone else to complete us, we are powerless until that happens, yet within a certain amount of variable time after we find that special someone, something is likely to cause us to feel incomplete again, even with the one who supposedly completes us. It is simply because we aren't loving ourselves and realizing that we are whole and complete already.
I think that a healthy vow would be, "I don't need you to complete me. I want you to be with me because I enjoy being around you. I feel good when I'm around you. I love your laugh. You're smart and you are great to talk with. I love myself just the way I am, as I love you just the way you are. For how ever long coming together will enhance and benefit us both, I'm in for that, and when it's not, I'm okay with that too. Thank you for being my friend and lover. I so enjoy being with you. I look forward to enjoying being with you in the days to come. I love you without any conditions attached as we come together freely seeking to enhance our joy."
This is true when it comes to careers, jobs, other kinds of relationships, and more. We keep our power within ourselves when we don't need those people or situations outside of ourselves to know our value. Our value within is a gift from our Creator, and She will never take that away, and as long as we choose to be full and not give it away ourselves, we are complete within. A relationship based on need is weak. A relationship based on desire from a place of fullness is always strong.
Let Us Come Together As Equal Whole People, Whether In Business, Or In Our Relationships. That Place Is Limitless.
Spread Some Joy Today--Whatever the weather wherever you are, there is joy in the air. Grab some.